Me: Pia Veleno
Caller: Can I talk to Pia?
Me: This is… Pia.
Caller: This is Karen from the Doctor’s office.
Me: Hi Karen.
Karen: The tests came back you have a UTI
Me (silently): Did the blood give you away?
Me (out loud): Ok.
Karen: Which pharmacy would you like me to call in the (some unpronounceable name that I assume means antibiotics)?
Me: Walgreen’s on Route 3
Karen: Hold on, I have to type it all into the system.
Me (types two text messages and still waiting)
Karen: Ok, I’ll fax that in … right … away.
Me (silently): Are you sure? Because you don’t sound sure and if I don’t get drugs tonight I’m going to send demons after your organs.
Me(out loud): Um, ok. Thanks.
Me: Have a great day and stop skimming off the top.