On Not Writing

There are a few things that I want to blog about, but those topics are darting around in my mind like hummingbirds on a blend of acid, speed, and high quality Jamaican coffee. Another time perhaps, once they’ve settled into coherency.

For now, I’m half-heartedly dragging myself out of the anti-writing funk that I’d been blaming on winter. Shorter days always kill my energy and creativity levels, but the days are now long enough for me to sneak out for runs after work, so I no longer have that excuse. I won’t call it writer’s block, because I don’t believe in that nonsense. I’m simply not focused and not working hard enough on getting that back. I think about it, but as any published writer will tell you, thinking about publishing and getting through all the steps of writing, editing, and revising are two very different beasts.

I still have time, but I suspect I’m going to miss the anthology call for the gay cowboys. I have six weeks, but despite the full synopsis in my head, I’ve managed to type less than 6k words of a 20k story. Yep, that’s how little focus I have.

But wait, I’m not blogging about this for sympathy, and I’m certainly not whining. Much of it comes down to two things.

One, my paying job is in the investments industry and thus tax season is crazy with “expected overtime” and anxious clients demanding to know why we reported what we did on their tax forms. It’s mentally draining, but it pays the bills.

Second, I’ve been dwelling a lot on publishing houses and the way they do things. This is one of those hummingbirds that I want to let free, but I’m not ready to blog about it just yet. With Summer Lust under contract with Loose Id, I’ve already seen some differences between Silver Publishing and Loose Id. Of course, I expected some, especially after what LI expected of me before offering a contract, and it’s not all one-sided either. Hence the need to sort it all out before diving into it further.

With so many bloggers and forums spouting off about e-publishers, and building my own experiences now, I start to dwell on good homes for my stories while I’m trying to write them. It’s very distracting, even though I have a plan. Even though I fully intend to finish the Personal Demons series for Silver and I fully intend to submit a group of contemporary stories to LI. Even though my plan hasn’t changed since I first signed Fallen, I find the entire matter distracting.

Enough excuses. I’m going to go for a run – the first all week after tearing up my calves pushing too hard with a modified stride – and yes, this helps the writing (the writing, not the injury). My mind focuses on stride, breathing, pace, and cars, but underneath all of that, subtle gears twist and grind laying out upcoming scenes and throwing kinks into the works. Not kinky kinks, dear readers, but those awful things that writers like to do to torment their characters. If I have to work this hard to get them to you, then they’re going to work damn hard for their happily ever after.

Pia Veleno

PS ~   Happy, happy birthday to my Dad. He insists he doesn’t celebrate such things, but I still do. Happy birthday Dad! I’m looking forward to our visit on Easter. Remember that framed needlepoint you always had in your office? I used to think they got your birthday wrong. How appropriate that, with your love of numbers, you were born the day after tax day. I love you!


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